Morning Mirror Edition 295 - 4/8/2008




In this edition

Smalls



TREADMILL TREMORS


TREADMILL TREMORS

I am sure there are many places where one should not attempt to use one's laptop !!

In the bath is one prime and obvious example, by the pool is probably another, yet another bad place is in a taxi and I will not elaborate on my reasons for that !!

But a new "no no" to be added to the "Places where one must not use a P.C." is on the treadmill ......

I really only wanted to utilise the excellent Tel One directory that Zimbabwe telecommunications offers on the internet. Just google Tel One Zimbabwe and hey presto, and if you enlarge the font majestically, you can read the entire Zimbabwe telephone book without your specs too !!

And once I had found the number I needed, the number of the Australian High Commission, I was then going to kill two birds with one stone, jog on the treadmill and at the same time try and get through to the High Commission to ask a question about visas.

Now we all know, not only Zimbabweans, how difficult it is to get through to a real live person in a government establishment.

Press one for visa, press 2 for passports, press three for consular matters etc etc etc ad nauseum.

What perfect place to while away the time, pressing buttons on the telephone, then hanging on for hours and hours, whilst steadily and merrily jogging on the treadmill, one ear hooked to the phone, the other ear to the i pod, where the Opera Babes were singing "Ave Maria" as only they can !!

The looking up the phone number with the computer balanced precariously on the consol turned into a debacle, probably because the computer was leaning on the "up" speed button ....

I had not realised just how fast I was going, as not all women can multi task, but when my ear phones blew off in the slip stream, I realised we had a problem....

However my athletic prowess is legendary and I managed to leap legs apart and straddle the running belt, computer balanced in one hand, phone in the other and i pod dangling by the ear phone cord, ominously close to the screaming red hot tread of the treadmill !!

Nothing daunted I slowed the pace down, placed the computer on the floor, set the font at the biggest possible, and started to dial .... and to dial ..... and to dial......

I tried every single number listed under the High Commission and then found a delightful lady, (probably the Ambassadors wife ) who gave me the correct number, probably wondering why this very out- of -breath lady was calling her as if she were some sort of consular receptionist !!

Forty minutes later I got through to visa section, but between singling along vociferously with the Opera Babes, and jogging gently but firmly for longer than I had intended, I was in no condition to voice my request.

" My husband has a South African Passport" I grunted hoarsely (sounding suspiciously like a heavy breather)

"No said the very nasal visa lady, this is not the South African embassy"... "No No" I squeaked breathlessly praying she would not hang up, "I have a South African passport and I need an Australian Tourist Visa "

It was at that moment that ZESA played its usual Friday morning trick on me .... the power went off ....

Now only those familiar with a treadmill will know about the alacrity with which a treadmill can stop. All the forces in creation work together in jet propulsion !!

If you are tall like the previous owner of the treadmill, one Brendan Beaumont, chances are you could do an elegant somersault into the next room. But if you are small like me, watch out !!

The excess adipose tissue that I am endeavouring to lose in this exercise regime, pushed me flying forwards with Titanic force. My ribs were lined up for perfect impact with the hand rail.

My ruddy and sweaty face went crashing into the LCD on the consol and it was then that I found out that HeeHoo does not always tell the truth.

LCD, he said, stands for Liquid Crystal Display, well let me tell you there was nothing at all liquid about it all, as I found out with my front teeth embedded in the display.

The poor lady from the embassy had probably never heard words or sounds quite like that before in her life, and she possibly hung up in terror.

Extricating slowly and painfully myself from the tangle, collecting my front teeth from the treadmill dashboard, I continued my telephone quest. Finding the number again I phoned in trepidation.

The phone funnily enough was answered almost immediately, and the voice said. This is the Australian High Commission, we are closed right now for the weekend, please phone again on Monday ........




CONDOLENCES

CONDOLENCES

STEYN - PETER EDWARD (Sonny)

Beloved husband of Sandra and father to Darrell and Andrea passed away on Tuesday 29th July 2008 6.45am, after a brave battle with Pancreatic and Liver Cancer. He was buried in Inhassoro, Mozambique.
Email sandymoz@tdm. co.mz

Sonny Steyn:

Sonny was relieved of his pain and called to rest in Mozambique on Tuesday 29th July 2008 after a short but bitter battle against cancer. My heartfelt sympathy to Sandy, Darryl and Partner and Andrea and partner and all the family on the passing of Sonny.
With my love always Liz Norman



CONDOLENCE

to Peter Johnstone and family, on the day of Carole's Funeral at the Church of the Ascension, saddened by the news of Carole's passing, and remembering the many concerts we enjoyed with you in Bulawayo, we offer you our sincere condolences, and celebrate with you a life well lived

Tony and Vivien Hyland, Durham, UK



CONDOLENCES

Molly Watson - My special and beloved friend who passed away on Monday 28 July in Leicester England. Molly will be sorely missed in WI circles. My love and sympathy to Phil and Francis.
Sandy
sandra.linder@ virgin.net

Molly Watson - Love and condolences to Phil and the family.
Betty Petrie

In Memorium.

Flemming - Helen Elizabeth. Beloved wife of Colin and mother of James. Sadly passed on a year ago today (29th of July). Our thoughts are with you all at this time.
Kindest Regards
From everyone at the Bulawayo Morning Mirror.

Condolences : John Stephen passed away on 26th July 2008
- special friend of Butch,Pam and family for many years.

Johnstone : Carole
My most sincere sympathies to Peter, the Johnstone, and Issells families on the sad loss of their courageous and beloved Wife, Mum and Grandmama. Carole was a very special lady and will be deeply missed by all who was privileged to know her. I am thinking of you all and wish you love, light and strength.
Liz Norman.. Galashiels.. Scotland


TIDBITS


Did you greet a fellow Zimbabwean on the way to work this morning?

You won't get that warm smile and acknowledgement anywhere else in the world!


Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.
--Henry James


"Nil carborundum illegitimi"


" A cause may be inconvenient, but it's magnificent. It's like champagne or high heels, and one must be prepared to suffer for it."
- Arnold Bennett -


Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.
--Confucius


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